Kapwa at Ginhawa: Expanding our circles for collective wellbeing
What does the word "kapwa" mean to you? Whose are the faces and what are the places that come to mind?
Note: Read until the end to find out how you can part of a by-invite-only online conversation on facilitating deeper connection with the cards (in June). In joining this conversation, chosen participants will also get one (1) free deck from our next print round.
Hello, mga ka-Ugnayan!
It’s Jen, writing this newsletter after a month of conversations and reflections inspired by our May theme Pakikipagkapwa or Kinship, on relationships, community, and connection with our kapwa. It is represented by the image of mushrooms.
While you may have your own interpretation or connections with fungi, for me and for Ugnayan, it represents how we are all interconnected.
Mycelium, the thread-like formation that makes up most fungi, connects roots to one another, allowing plants and trees to communicate with one another to create healthier ecosystems. It forms the largest network — a mycorrhizal network, a “wood-wide web” — beneath the earth.
Kapwa at Ugnayan
Like this connective thread, kapwa also recognizes our interconnectedness.
Kapwa recognizes a shared identity or a shared inner self with others or our fellow beings. Kapwa is “a moral obligation to treat one another as equal fellow human beings”, says Virgilio Enriquez, father of Sikolohiyang Pilipino.1
For me, kapwa is about returning to our humanity, and recognizing that we are more alike than different. Ang pagkilala ng kapwa ang simula ng Ugnayan, as we like to say for Ugnayan.
We connect more deeply with ourselves when we recognize our relationship with our kapwa — when we recognize the circles in which we receive care, and the circles to whom we give care.
There’s so much wisdom in the language of kapwa, and how the othering of certain groups of people and even nature have led to disconnection and destruction — especially when we think of the months-long decades-long fight for Palestine, or locally, in the many oppressive regimes that abuse power and privilege over the marginalized, whether farmers, fisherfolk, peasant organizers, and more.
I think it is a revolution in ourselves when we question how or why certain things are — why injustice and inequity among kapwa exist in this world, and reflect on our role in that, even when those things are uncomfortable.
Pagkilala ng Kapwa
So when you’re asked: “What does the word ‘kapwa’ mean to you?”, whose faces and which places come to mind?
While it may be that our family, friends, colleagues are the ones that come to mind more immediately, maybe we can also consider:
How are we recognizing wider circles of kapwa beyond our immediate circles?
How might recognizing and spending time in the company of those who we currently see as different from us expand our ways of being?
In what ways does connecting with others expand the ways we perceive ourselves?
And again, because kapwa is about a shared inner identity:
What are the things we connect on with “others”?
And among those things, what surprises us and challenges the notions we have of ourselves?
Notes on Pakikipagkapwa
For this, I resort to the words and feelings captured by our recent ka-tambay Vhiang:
Always have open ears, heart, and mind for others
Connections may be fleeting or lasting; what matters is the parts of them you carry in life
The freedom to be authentic involves liberating yourself from pessimistic thoughts and assumptions. Giving others a chance to know the real you weighs more than whatever happens next
Wearing different masks in front of different people isn’t necessarily a bad thing. It’s a way to find a common ground with others thus creating more connections
Express your gratitude daily—it can be through writing letters to yourself/others or little greetings/acts of service
Keeping your circle small and tight-knit is great, but being open to new connections might surprise you
Listening and empathizing is enough; you don’t always have to know or say the “right words”
So whether it’s a group of strangers, age old friends or even family, in what ways are we creating meaningful moments for connection? :)
Share connection, shape Ugnayan
And before I go, we wanted to gain insight from you — our most engaged ka-Ugnayans! We’re so happy that our cards helped folks bring connection to your own circles, and we wanted to know how we could make them even better!
And so, we humbly request for your thoughtful and honest responses in our Ugnayan Cards Reflection & Feedback Form on or before Sunday, June 9, 2024.
From the responses, 6-12 respondents will be chosen for a by-invite-only online conversation on facilitating deeper connection with the cards. In joining this conversation, chosen participants will also get one (1) free deck from our next print round. :)
To more conversations and connections ahead,
Jen Horn | @pagbubuo
Tagapagpadaloy ng Ugnayan Cards
Read more in my post Pakikipag-Ugnayan: On returning to authentic and meaningful connection.